Female Viagra: Addyi

One giant leap backwards for female sexuality...

Women are perceived as the problem 

There exist numerous reasons as to why a person would have a lower sexual desire in a relationship. They are actually multiple in most cases and they necessitate a variety of interventions to find a solution to the situation. For a long time now, we have categorized women as the partner who loses sexual desire (libido) in a couple because men are the high desire partners due to their hormones, more specifically testosterone. We tend to notice that in sexologist offices we find as much men being the low desire partner in the couple. In fact, we even see many gay couples where either one or both partner has a lower sexual desire.

For some reason, we continue to perceive women as the gender who loses sexual desire or has less than men as a general rule in long term relationships. The reason why men and women lose their sexual desire does tend to differ though. What we are noticing more in female sexuality is a lack of interest for sexual activity, not because they have deregulated hormones or neurotransmitters or that women just have less sexual drive than men, but it is because they are sexually bored with their partner's. Women seek variety, spontaneity, newness, a sense of adventure and exploration and a context to their sex life, as well as a sexual connection (not necessarily an emotional one, but a sexual one)

When we are with the same partner for many years, it is only natural and normal to have a decrease in sexual desire, if our sexuality is redundant, routine, predictable and with a lack of effort from both partners. A decrease in sexual desire is often not the problem, but more of a symptom of our sexual and relationship dynamic that needs to be worked at. 

What about female Viagra?

For what reason this new medication won't help the majority of women who have a decrease in sexual desire? The simple answer is: it doesn't take care of the cause, buy only the symptoms. By taking this pill, that has important side effects, will only give false hope to couples that should be analysing their relationship dynamic and their sexual satisfaction. The medication might have an impact for a certain time where the motivation to have sex will increase, but the couple's sex life will remain the same. Therefore, the problem will most likely resurface in a short amount of time. No medication can help boring sex for a prolong period of time in long term relationships.

Too often, one of the partners, most of the time women, perceive sex with their partner as an obligation of the relationship to maintain the couple or to avoid conflicts. After giving and receiving multiple times pity sex, it is inevitable that the sex life of the couple will deteriorate and the relationship will also take a hard hit. 

Video about female Viagra (French)

Does this medication apply to certain women at least?

The short answer is yes...but with the following criteria:

• Stable relationship for at least a year with a man (exclusions of lesbian couples)
• Loss of sexual desire must have been obtained during the relationship
• Complete loss of sexual desire (no erotic dreams or fantasies, no desire to masturbate)
• Sexual response must be functional capacity to lubricate and reach orgasm following stimulation
• + 18 years old but not year having menopause
• Not be pregnant or breast feeding
• No psychotherapy in the last 3 months
• No medication related to mood disorders
• No suicidal thought ever in life
• No relationship difficulties
• Good reaction from partner about the decrease in sexual desire

These criteria are not about the medication that will be released in October, but of the research that studied the medication Although, we can clearly see that this medication was aimed a very few women with a particular profile with this difficulty. 

Therefore, this pill might «potentially» help certain women and couples in dealing with this sexual difficulty that we find in the majority of relationships, if and only if, the cause for the decrease in sexual desire is related to a deregulation of neurotransmitters in the female partner. 

Finally!

If you or your partner is having a decrease or lack of sexual desire, take the time to really analyse your situation and determine if you need help from a sexologist & psychotherapist or the medication or a combination of both. 

Francois Renaud M.A.

Sexologist & psychotherapist Montréal